The Oakland Hairders

The Hairders association has been around since the era of cavemen when the game of hairball, was invented. This sport took place in the hills of Oakland, CA, where it originated. There, cavemen would rip off clumps of hair from their bodies and then combine them to form an oval figure which they referred to as the hairball.

The hairball was a new invention by the cavemen that would change the way they communicated with each other and other cave men from across the country. The sport of hairball led to the development of different associations and clubs that supported their favorite hairball teams. From the hairiest of cavemen to the smoothest of them all. It brought competition to the cavemen community. The sport consisted of the hairball being formed by the hairball players and then being launched long distances across the hills of Oakland. There was no real purpose of this sport because there was no beneficial value other then having less hair on their bodies from ripping it off to make a hairball every match.

There was no real talent among these cavemen who played in the National Hairball League (NHL). They all had no real talents or jobs which allowed them to qualify for the hairball league and if they were lucky to be apart of the Oakland Hairders. The Oakland Hairders was the most elite squad of hairballers across the country. They owned the hills of Oakland and knew every hair and who it belonged to. They won every match against any competitor no matter where these hairballers came from. The advantage of the Oakland Hairders was that this was their game. They invented it and because they were the inventors they could adjust the rules to suit their liking, which almost always helped them win their matches.

The Oakland Hairders were well known for their famous multicolor Hairders logo. It consisted of multicolored hairs from all of the hairballers on the squad. The colors ranged from brown, black, blonde, orange, and even white for their fellow albino cavemen. The logo represented all of the cavemen who were from the most elite and prestige class of hairballers and who were honored to play for such a famous team.

The matches have no boundaries. They can take place all over the hills of Oakland and even in the residential streets. Since the cavemen founded the sport they are allowed to enjoy it anywhere they please. Many cavemen dream of being hairballers when they are old enough and even practice day and night to grow their hairs out to an impressive length in hopes of being noticed by the Hairders.

Unfortunately, not all cavemen are elite enough to make it to the National Hairball League.

These cavemen are easy to spot because they take their talents elsewhere such as to Geico where they star in not so funny commercials.

Scott Chahine