Expired Parking Meter warrants financial penalty for extraterrestrial vehicle Edit

Parking Meter attendant George Fauxnom issued a fine of $170 to a crashed UFO in downtown San Francisco, which made planet-fall after a lightning storm struck the Bay in August. Approximately 4 dozen UFOs crash land in the Continental United States a year according to a report released in 2012 by the California Department of Interstellar Vehicles, but this specific one occupied 3 parking spaces on a heavily congested street of the city, inconveniencing commuting motorists and neighborhood locals alike. after multiple warnings were taped to the outside of the unresponsive Flying Saucer, the City authorized the issuance of a public nuisance and traffic violation fine.

Extraterrestrials don't deserve special treatment Edit

Meter attendant George Fauxnom happily obliged with the issuance of the fine, signing the ticket with a flourish and cited multiple precedents in which states brought legal repercussions upon alien interference, such as the 1947 Roswell incident, in which a New Mexican Rancher successfully sued the pilot of a ship that had crashed into his property for negligence, being awarded a large settlement which has yet to be paid according to lawyer Jerry Stonewall in his book, "Litigating the Little Green Men," (P.73). George Fauxnom admits that he does not have high hopes for the fine to be payed, but that it was a good first step, as in a personal interview "It's time that the big-heads payed their fair share, they come to our planet and harvest our natural resources, the least they can do is give a little into the city's funding," (Fauxnom 2013).

First steps in legal responsibility for alien damages Edit

With a growing tide of extraterrestrial asylum seekers leading to an increase in UFO-related accidents every year, more and more organizations and individuals are demanding recompense, with the City of San Francisco set to roll out a new impounding system for seized spaceships in light of extraterrestrial abuse of diplomatic niceties and public disturbance. Alien Affairs Task Force head Julia Fictusnomen has released a compendium of proposals on the alien legal-responsibility situation to be reviewed by the City government in preparation of a draft of focused bills. "This Task Force is fully convinced that current leniency of extraterrestrial misbehavior is damaging to the City of San Francisco, and harmful to public safety," (Fictusnomen 25).

References Edit

California Department of Interstellar Vehicles. (2012) UFO Crash and Damage Report. Sacramento, CA: Office of State Publishing

Fauxnom, G. personal communication & interview, 8th December 2013

Fictusnomen, J. (2014) Fictusnomen Commission, San Francisco, CA: Municipal Publishing

Stonewall, J. (1979) Litigating the Little Green Men, San Francisco, CA: Truthful Publications

Erwin Uppal & Anna Vilhauer Comm40-Sec03